Shameless Self Promotion

Fear and Loathing in America, Land of the Not-So-Free

I know it's been a few days. No apology will be given. I've been in a state of creative catatonia since early Wednesday morning when I read that Kerry will be conceding and they won't be bothering with waiting for the provisional/absentee ballots to be counted. Depressing. But life goes on. I've been spending more time paying attention to what others have to say about all of this, because I just don't know how to react. I've been especially liking the coverage on Wonkette. The editor, Ana Marie Cox, and Jon Stewart (The Daily Show), and comedians like David Cross will certainly have enough material for the next four years. Enough material to keep us laughing when we stop getting paid for overtime, and enough to keep us laughing when we realize that the war on terrorism is as ridiculous as a war on time or life or kittens or anything else so broad and vague. I'll be laughing at their jokes when I can no longer afford to put gas in my car when it goes up to $10 per gallon (which of course, will happen after Bush invades the rest of the Middle East, and declares it his new kingdom). I'm sure I'll be laughing when the Bush daughters start embarrassing daddy on a much grander scale than in the past. In the meantime, here's something fun. Note how Barbara (on the right) seems to be particularly 'happy' to be there watching daddy speak after finding out that he won...

(Reuters)

All Glory to the Hypno Toad!

VOTE!VOTE!VOTE!VOTE!

Tonight on the Beeb

When I was younger, like maybe 12 or 13, I started noticing that a lot of my favorite bands had records out that were just called "Peel Sessions." At first, I didn't understand why they were called that, but I quickly figured out that these records were recorded live in the studio, which is actually the next best thing to live on stage. In some cases, it's actually better. Eventually, by cross-referencing different music reviews, interviews, and whatnot in SPIN magazine, Rolling Stone, Alternative Press, Option, and NME, I figured out that the "Peel Sessions" were recorded for John Peel, a DJ at the BBC. It took a little while to figure out that he was the patron saint of music on the fringe...and not just for Great Britain, bands from all over the world would send him their music because they knew that he really cared, and he would give them a chance. Through his radio shows on the BBC, he pushed so much music on the fringe whether it was Joy Division or the Undertones (whose single "Teenage Kicks" was his favorite single ever) or Goldie (drum & bass) or hip hop, he was there and on top of it. He was the Johnny Appleseed of all the music that exists just outside of the mainstream. He started in radio in the early 1960s on several American radio stations. He was born in Heswall, England (near Liverpool), but found his first radio jobs in America. He soon came back to the UK, and started in at the BBC on Radio 1. His influence on 'alternative' and 'college' rock was immeasurable. I've never even heard one of his radio shows live, yet I own several recordings from his shows including Joy Division, New Order, the White Stripes, Siouxsie & the Banshees, and the Dirtbombs. This past Monday night, while on holiday in Peru, the 65-year old Peel died of a heart attack. He will be missed.

Bastards of Young

Tonight, like every Wednesday night for the past month, I have forgone seeing a few rock 'n' roll shows I really wanted to see: the Whiskey Diaries with Dillinger 4 and the Briefs, Mike Watt, Against Me!, and the Blood Brothers. I really wanted to see these shows, but I made a sacrifice. Why? Because I love to DJ. I love to play music for people. I've been doing it for over 10 years. I've sacrificed seeing so many shows, house parties, and many other events that I wanted to be at so badly, but I had to DJ. Sometimes it's about the money, but so often it's really about the actual act itself. Tonight, I continue with my years and years of music accumulation...tonight, I DJ at the Painted Lady in Hamtramck at 2930 Jacob (almost at the corner of Jacob and Joseph Campau). I start at 10pm, end at 2am. I'll be showing some unusual films on the DVD player. This gig is exclusively punk/rock/roll and all the variants. Call the Painted Lady at 313 874 2991 after 4pm EST for more info. Or email me. Either/or.

$142,134,382,662

Ya know what that number is? As of 11:06 am EST, 10/27/04, that was the cost of the war in Iraq. Well, obviously, it's not a war, it's an illegal occupation, but I'm not a politician, I'm not gonna argue semantics. Anywho, there's this website from the National Priorities Project called "The Cost of War." The site calculates the cost of war up to the second. The numbers are going up continuously as we speak...right now. Do you know that right now, the occupation in Iraq costs each taxpayer $504? Oh, wait, now it's $505. I got sidetracked for a few minutes. The site is really interesting because it gives you the chance to see how that money could've been spent on more worthwhile things like education or public health. Check it out.

Fear and Loathing In An Electoral Democracy

For various reasons, I am an absentee voter this year. I cannot make it to my registered voting precinct on the day of the election. So, they sent my ballot last week, I filled it out, and returned it. Yes, folks, I have already voted.

When looking over the ballot, I saw the usual list of candidates running for offices I didn't even know existed, as usual. The University of Michigan Board of Regents? What? Oh, that guy's a Democrat? Okay, I'll vote for him, sure, whatever. I don't go to UofM, and probably never will, so it doesn't matter, does it? There's a similar list of candidates for the Michigan State University Board of Regents and the Michigan Board of Education. Finally! I saw a name I recognized. My old neighbor, Scotty Bowman (no, not the former coach of the Red Wings) is running for the MI Board of Education on the Libertarian ticket. Interesting.

So, of course, the first list of candidates that you come to are the presidential candidates. I know you know of the Democrats and Republicans. You might know the Libertarians and the Green Party, but have you ever heard of the Natural Law Party? How 'bout the US Taxpayer's Party? They have candidates on the presidential ballot. Seeing as how I had the ballot at home, and I had time to look it over, I decided to look into these 'other' parties. I already knew who I was voting for, but I was still interested in what the others had to say. So, as a service to my readers, I'm gonna provide some info on these other parties that exist on the fringe of the bi-partisan world.

• Libertarian Party: They refer to themselves as "The Party of Principle." Their basic platform is a commitment to America's "heritage of freedom," i.e. individual liberty and personal responsibility, a free-market economy of abundance and prosperity, and a foreign policy of non-intervention, peace, and free-trade.
• The Green Party: The "Greens" as they call themselves believe in the "radical vision" of grassroots political and economic democracy, nonviolence, social justice, and ecological sustainability.
• US Taxpayers Party: Apparently, this party was created in 1992, but are now called the Constitution Party. In 1999, they voted to change the party's name, but some state affiliates have retained the original name. Michigan is one of those states, this is why the ballots in Michigan say "US Taxpayers Party" instead of the Constitution Party. Their basic platform is to restore American jurisprudence to its Biblical foundations and to limit the federal government to its Constitutional boundaries.
• Natural Law Party: The Natural Law Party was founded in April 1992 to “bring the light of science into politics.” Their platform is kind of complicated, but definitely interesting. I'd like to see things get to a point where they could actually have a real shot at the presidency.

As you can see, I've provided links for you to check out each party. I highly suggest that before you go out and vote next week, you go to each party's site and check out their platforms.

My personal opinion is that the Libertarians have some interesting things going on, but too many people are fixated on their aggressive opinions towards the right to bear arms and decriminalizing some currently felonious drugs, such as marijuana. I'm fine with the latter, but against the former. The Green Party are also interesting and have some very positive things to say, but they were hurt significantly when Ralph Nader ran on their ticket in the 2000 election. He was perceived as being too much of a whiner, and I think that reflected badly on the party. The US Taxpayers Party, aka the Constitution Party sound like a bunch of weird leftist religious zealots. That scares me. The Natural Law Party I'm especially interested in for their focus on science, but like the rest of these, it may be a long time before a third party is a strong and worthwhile contender for the American presidency.

The Young Livers Rule the Bar Tonight

I want to be late for work tomorrow. I want to wake up feeling like I'm too drunk to drive. I want rock 'n' roll, and I want it now. I want drunken debauchery. I need a numb face. I want to feel like my brain is floating around in my skull. I crave the sweet bitterness of Jameson Irish whiskey. I want to wake up not knowing what I did last night.

Night Time, Anytime, It's Alright

Somedays, like today I really wonder what I'm doing. In the past, people would want to get all of their crazy stuff out of the way while they were still young, because inevitably, they'd be married with kids and therefore unable to do anything too crazy. Is that the case? I think I see it the opposite way. I'm 28 years old, and I have my whole life ahead of me yet. I have no intention of ever having children, and I don't see marriage as something that would tie me down.

As far as I'm concerned, all I got out of the way when I was young was alcoholism, recreational pot-smoking, and quixotical overblown idealistic infatuations with women who weren't into me. I've had some time to figure out who I am, what I wanna do, and how I'm gonna do it. Sort of. Okay, not really. I know who I am, I know many things I want to do, but I have no idea how I'm going to do it.

I believe in freewill, yet I somehow believe in karmic reaction. Make any sense? No, it doesn't. I don't ascribe to any particular brand of religion, I prefer my own personal amalgamation. I take a little of this, a little of that, throw in a few contradictions to make things interesting, and I'm all set. What does this mean? It means that while there are many things I want to do in my life...I also believe that some things are meant to happen. Some people are meant to be together, some people are meant to die young, some people are meant to never know what love is. Don't get me wrong, I'm not talking about any pre-destination Christian b.s. here. I'm talking about a sublime order of things dictated by science, and natural law, not God's law. I don't mean to get all religious on all of you, but it's a necessary explanation.

I think that by freewill, what I choose will lead me to certain situations that were meant to happen. I guess you could say that I believe in an illusion of freewill that's actually guided by the natural order of things. This may be why I have very loose plans for my future. I may appear to be indecisive most of the time, but it's really because I'm just calculating. It's also because sometimes - okay, more often that not, I find myself in the company of certain people whom I know very well. I know what I want to do, and I know what they probably want to do, but we're in disagreement, so I leave a decision up to them. I'm flexible.

Maybe I'm too flexible in my life. Fuck that. Flexibility is good. Why can't everyone be more flexible, more loose? Everyone would enjoy themselves and each other and life so much more if they could just compromise more often. Take a day off work once in awhile, say fuck it and drive to Chicago on a Tuesday night, skip school, I don't know, just don't get caught up in your superficial obligations. One of the best things in life is caring for other people and them caring for you. Pay attention to those people, and leave everything else behind once in awhile. Compromise and find a balance. I'm so flexible because I just like hanging out with my friends and my beautiful girlfriend. I'm just happy being there, it doesn't really matter what we do. I think some people put too much emphasis on planning and decision making. Oh, wait, I'm one of those people. This is where I need to get a little more flexible. I can say fuck it, whatever, okay let's do that instead, but if you make a plan with me, you better try to at least stick to part of it, okay?

Speaking of plans, I wish I could have it all figured out. I wish I could say where I'll be in a year, and what I'll be doing. I wish I could know what I could do for the rest of my life that will make me happy. There's someone in my life whom I'm close to who thinks she has some of it figured out, and maybe she does, I don't know. She thinks she's all set. Plans are in motion, education is being dealt with, plane tickets are bought and maybe she's got it all taken care of, maybe it's what she's meant to do in life.

I guess I'm just more interested in seeing where situation takes me. I'm hoping the situation will be a job that takes me to Europe for an indefinite amount of time, but that's just one of the things I'd like to do. There's so much.

Who needs a drink?

Everybody's Gotta Learn Sometimes

When I hear this record, I'm almost speechless. I don't now how to explain it...I don't now what to say.

On the soundtrack for the recent film "Eternal Sunshine of a Spotless Mind," Beck recorded a cover song. "Everybody's Gotta Learn Sometimes" is the closer of the film, it's the final moments when we see Jim Carrey and Kate Winslet run off together, re-united. The song is originally from a British late '70s band, the Korgis. I've never heard of them, but I like this song. In trying to figure out what Beck album this song is on (not yet realizing it's only on this soundtrack), my first thought was that it would be on "Sea Change," because I had heard the record briefly when it came out, and the sound was similar. Well, I went through all the songs on the CD, and none of them were from the movie. But...it made me want to explore "Sea Change" a bit more. I think I listened to it at least three times a day every day last week, and several days this week, too.

Have you ever heard of Gram Parsons? He was originally in the International Submarine Band, then the Flying Burrito Brothers, then the Byrds, then he went solo, when he started doing a lot of duets with Emmylou Harris. He's known for being one of the originators of the country-rock sound. Bob Dylan's more country-sounding stuff is probably the most well known country-rock. I know you know a song from Gram Parsons. At least one, maybe two. He wrote "Wild Horses," and let the Rolling Stones release it on an album before he did. His version came out a few weeks later on a Flying Burrito Brothers record. You probably also know "Love Hurts." The original is from Roy Orbison, and Nazareth's cover is fairly well known, but Parsons recorded it, too, and it's with Emmylou Harris. I think his version is probably my favorite. It's almost painful, it's so sad.

Okay, I've gotten too far off track. I digress by nature. Sorry. So, what I was trying to say is that Beck's album "Sea Change" is a very, very country-rock record. I need to stress that I'm not saying alt-country. It's not like any Wilco record. And, much like a Gram Parsons record, it's warm and even a little consoling. It's obviously a breakup album, but somehow Beck manages to make you feel like everything's going to be okay. This is not the crazy experimentation found on "Odelay" or "Mellow Gold." There's no Vegas glitz like on "Midnight Vultures." This is a man stripping away all the tricks and baring his soul. His voice is so evocative and and and and I don't know, it's just such a damned good album.

Hello Amsterdam

So, last night, I couldn't sleep, and I really wanted to hear the album "San Francisco" from the American Music Club. I knew it was in a pile of CDs I've neglected for awhile. They're mostly my music-to-fall-asleep-by pile. Not that it's bad music. It's stuff like Sigur Ros and Pan Sonic and Jah Wobble and Godflesh. Ambient or light pop, mostly. While shuffling through the four or five one-foot stacks of CDs, I finally found the AMC album, but I found some more things, too. Some albums I forgot about.

Holy crap, if you like Stereolab, you absolutely need...no, wait, you abso-fucking-lutely have to check out the album "Happyness" from The Aluminum Group. I forgot how good it is.

I also re-discovered the album "Nilsson Schmilsson" from Harry Nilsson. This one is a little weird. Whether you know it or not, you've heard at least three songs from this album. I know you have. I have no doubts. First of all, you've heard "Without You," possibly unwillingly, but you've heard it because Air Supply, Badfinger, Mariah Carey, Shirley Bassey, Petula Clark, Ray Conniff, Percy Faith, Heart, Henry Mancini, Johnny Mathis, Wayne Newton, Donny Osmond, and Andy Williams have ALL recorded a version of the song. Up until Mariah Carey had a long-running number one single with it, Nilsson's version was the most well-known, but not the original. You also know the Nilsson song "Coconut." I know you know it: "you put the lime in the coconut..." and it was in the movie "Reservoir Dogs." You also know "Jump Into the Fire" and "Let the Good Times Roll." Both were big hits in the '70s.

Also re-discovered was "Motorlab 3" from Pan Sonic and Barry Adamson. Pan Sonic are known for their abstract minimalist electronic stuff. They're Finnish. Barry Adamson was once in the band Magazine (Howard Devoto's post-Buzzcocks band), Crime and the City Solution, and he currently still is in the Bad Seeds, as in Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds. This album is basically one track, "The Hymn of the 7th Illusion," along with a Hafler Trio remix of the first track. There's a choir mixed with electronic ambience. Dark ambience. This shit is heavy. The remix isn't too bad, but the original version is better.

"You'd Prefer an Astronaut" from Hum has to be one of the best things to come out of bands-trying-to-sound-a-little-like the Smashing Pumpkins. Okay, so not quite. There are a lot more things going on here dynamically, and I can't be so simple in explaining the sound. I'm sure you've heard the song "Stars."

There was one other album that I found that doesn't fit into the music-to-fall-asleep-by category. I'm not even sure why it was buried in those piles. It's "Manic Compression" from Quicksand. I fucking love this band. If anyone out there has a good, clean-sounding copy of the Gorilla Biscuits stuff with Walter singing, let me know, I'd love to get a copy of that. Thanks.

Scat-Obsessed Teddy Bears and Pixelated Robots

Obviously, most of you wouldn't be here if you didn't spend some amount of time online on a computer. It's likely that many of you spend most of your time online while at work. You might even know of a few good places to go to waste time online. A couple years ago, I started coming across web comics, and it seems that the whole thing has totally blown up. There are so many good ones out there, plus regular comics that are usually in newspapers that can also be found online. Tonight, I'm giving you a list of top-quality online comic strips. These are my favorites:

• Derf City: Derf's comic is online only, but he does have some books available, such as the one detailing his celebrity schoolmate, Jeffrey Dahmer. Yes, that's real, he really went to school with Dahmer, and then made a mostly depressing graphic novel about it. Derf's strip has no running narrative or storyline. There only a few regular characters, but they don't appear very often. His schtick is his overblown and sadly realistic caricatures of the political right and the cultural bottom of society.
• Ted Rall: Ted Rall is a noted cartoonist and columnist. His cartoons have appeared as regular features in Time and Fortune magazines, which is surprising considering his slightly alarmist liberal views. No regular characters, no running narrative. His columns are just as worth checking out as his comics. Very political, but not confusing. Very sharp wit.
• Tom Tomorrow: This Modern World. Tom's comic is locally seen in Detroit's biggest alternative weekly, the Metro Times. It can also be seen on Working for Change. He does have some regular characters, but no running narrative. Very sarcastic and of course, very political.
• R. Stevens: Diesel Sweeties. Billed as a "pixelated robot romance web comic," that's exactly what it delivers, along with some social commentary on cultural tribes. There's Indie Rock Pete, who's so hip he barely exists, Metal Steve who has a mullet, always wears a t-shirt with a skull on it, and insists on keeping his virginity, Maura the former porn star who is now retired and dating Clango the robot, Lil' Sis, Maura's little sister who has bisexual tendencies purely for the sake of trendiness, and Electron Mike, the required computer geek who doesn't know how to communicate with women. There are other characters who appear less often like the Red Robot who wants to destroy all "hu-mans," and Pale Suzie, the goth girl. It's almost like a little soap opera, but it's really fucking funny.
• J. Jacques: Questionable Content. This one is fairly new to me, I found it while checking out the links on Diesel Sweeties. It may not look like much if you just look at the most recent post, but go back to the beginning, and read all of them, it's funny as hell.
• Neil Swaab: Rehabilitating Mr. Wiggles. Mr. Wiggles can be seen every week in Detroit's other local alternative weekly newspaper, Real Detroit. This comic is probably horribly, horribly vile and offensive to most people, but I love it. It's blasphemous, it's perverted, it's disgusting, and it's beautiful. Two main characters: Neil and his roommate/best friend Mr. Wiggles, who happens to be a teddy bear. A teddy bear who likes little boys and shitting on the couch. This seriously has to be seen, but be warned, it's very offensive and probably not safe for work.
• David Rees: Get Your War On. So, this one does have some regular characters, but no running narrative, and the characters themselves don't really have any regular personality, they're just vehicles for the word balloons in the comic. Very smarmy, smart-ass political commentary. A lot of swearing. Good shit.

In fact, go back to the archives on all of these, it's totally worth it.

Malai Kofta's Revenge

...and now, a few words from Adbusters:

Was it when you first heard the polar ice caps were melting? Or when you read that mother's milk is now too toxic for newborns? Maybe it was when you first tasted the sweet, rich flesh of a homegrown tomato? Or when you finally figured out that even if half the people on the planet lived like us, we'd all be dead in 20 years?Those are the ahhh moments when you suddenly see the world anew and realize that there has to be -- we have to find -- another way to live.Buy Nothing Day is one step in that direction. We get together and take a stand against the chronic overconsumption that is the mother of all our ecological, psychological and political problems.On November 26th, we refuse to participate. We flip our routines and discover new angles. We get active in our communities. And some of us go out and create some mayhem.Here's a good place to get started: adbusters.org. See what other people around the world are doing this year. Discover a new way to meet other activists in your city. Visit the Action Pyramid and help make this BND the blast that's heard around the world.

Coming Soon to a Site Near You...

Fear and loathing with external USB disk drives...the new Interpol record...Beck's country-folk...Detroit winters...and sleeping all day - a new hobby of mine.

Hair On the Wrong Side of the Hand

I, for one would like to welcome our new ejaculatory overlords.

Unbelievable

Genius. Pure fucking genius. Google has a new service that allows you to lookup definitions of words, Yellow Pages type listings, phone numbers, lookup zip codes, and I don't even know what else all using text-messaging from your cell phone. Check it out here.

Viceland

You have to read this, it's fucking hilarious. Get some education, people!

Time for Heroes

A friend of mine from a local Detroit band toured with his band in Great Britain last summer, and one of the bands they played with was the Libertines, who happen to be British. When I saw my friend, fresh off touring Europe all summer, he was telling me about some of the bands they played with and he said that the Libertines were a sloppy mess onstage, but really knew how to party. By that time, I had already been enticed by the Clash references on the little sticker on the packaging and bought their first album. I liked it a lot, so I was a little bummed out to hear that they weren't that great live. Flash forward a year. They have a new album out, it's self-titled, they're out on tour, they've replaced their junky-with-issues guitarist Peter, and they're storming the US with Radio 4. Out of curiosity, I went to the show. Lately, I haven't been making it to many shows out of general apathy towards live music. I feel like I've been let down by some of the bands I've seen in the past few months. This is the thing, the Libertines could almost be called the British Strokes. Except the Libs are rougher and faster and more glam. They look like they sound, and they don't act like rich kids, cuz they aren't. I guess you could say they're a more real manifestation of what the Strokes are. Plus, I've seen the Strokes, and I know they had a reputation for rough and tumble shows, but I have yet to see that side of the band. When I saw them at the State Theater in Detroit last November (for free, thankfully), I thought they were pathetic and boring. They just stood there, and played the songs EXACTLY the way they sound on the album. There was no point, it was a waste of $40 for the people who actually paid to see that steaming pile of shit onstage. So, back to the task at hand, the Libertines did what the Strokes are now too important to do: they entertained me. Shit, there were people who were actually dancing, and the Dirtbombs or the Hentchmen were nowhere in sight! That's right, a Detroit rock 'n' roll audience was actually seen dancing at a show! Part of my current disillusionment with live music is that too many bands seem bored while playing. Not last night. The Libertines actually played for over an hour, I think they played almost every song they've released, and the faster tunes were twice as fast as they are on the albums. When they came out for their encore, the two guitarists were shirtless, and as my friend said, "that's quite gratuitous of them." Of course the ladies loved it. They then proceeded to crash and burn through several more songs instead of playing just one more and leaving it at that. Oh, and my friend was right, they definitely know how to party. There was a fifth of Jameson Irish whiskey onstage all night, and an empty case of Stella Artois (a high alcohol content Belgian beer that's getting popular with European partying types) outside of their tourbus. Cheers.

A Time To Be So Small

So many interesting things going on today. Christopher Reeves, aka Superman is dead at 52. Go here for the full story on that.

The latest polls show that Kerry has a 3 point lead over Dubya. Maybe all of the "anyone but Bush" activism is finally paying off? Or maybe the two debates so far have proven what an idiot Bush really is. Finally.

This next issue is something close to me. Back in 1999, Indy Media was created because the mainstream news outlets were failing to adequately cover the news during the World Trade Organization conference in Seattle. It's a network of collectively run media outlets for the creation of radical, passionate, and accurate tellings of the truth. Last Thursday, the FBI ordered the site's host, Rackspace to turn over one of the servers that hosts a large portion of the IndyMedia site. This server also happened to be the host for individual IndyMedia sites that span over 17 countries around the world. If you're not aware of the impact or reach of IndyMedia, they have nodes all over the globe. There isn't one for Detroit, but there is one for Michigan, and there's a site for Windsor as well. Apparently, a few months back, the FBI, acting on behalf of the Swiss government, requested that IndyMedia remove an article that discussed Swiss undercover police. I don't know whether or not they complied with the request, but I do know that the method of the request is the same method that was used last week. The request was executed through the Mutual Legal Assistance Treaty, which was established by the US to establish procedures for countries to assist each other in investigations such as international terrorism, kidnapping, and money laundering. Basically, it makes it easier for countries to stick their noses in other country's business. IndyMedia's host, Rackspace is not able to comment on why the server was seized. This is part of the MLAT. Go here for the full story. IndyMedia is the grassroots campaign that has organized and galvanized activists around the world to take action against a wide variety of issues including George W. Bush, Globalization, slave labor, child welfare, the elimination of overtime pay, the World Trade Organization, NAFTA, labor union issues, the International Monetary Fund, as well as hundreds of other issues and actions around the world that destroy us.

Vertigo

(This is the info on the afterparty I mentioned in the previous post. Courtesy of Mike Trombly)

Official Vice Magazine Libertines/Radio 4 After Party,Sunday

After the show at the Magic Stick on Sunday night, be sure to be at the only ever official Vice magazine after party here in Detroit.

BOTH THE LIBERTINES AND RADIO 4 WILL BE DJ'ING!!!!!

Things will most likely kick off at 11:00pm or so and who knows how long it will go...

THIS EVENT IS NOT AT THE MAGIC STICK!!!

IT IS AT THE DETROIT EAGLE @ 1501 HOLDEN
THE EAGLE IS LOCATED OFF OF TRUMBULL BETWEEN I-94 AND GRAND BLVD. MAKE A LEFT ONTO HOLDEN OFF OF TRUMBULL...
THERE IS NOT A SIGN ON THE BUILDING BUT THE ADDRESS IS ABOVE THE DOOR - 1501 HOLDEN

THIS EVENT IS FREE, THERE ARE CHEAP DRINKS AND SECURED PARKING!

This night at the Eagle has been going on for a few weeks now and if you haven't been out yet then this is the perfect opportunity...

Along with The Libertines and Radio 4, we will have The Young Soul Rebels Crew (Dion & Dave) as well as the Tamion Crew (Sam & Mike) Spinning an eclectic mix...

There will be NYC Vice Press at this event so be sure to be there - it's free and ALL BEER IS $2.50...

Argh

Lots of Stoli + White Castle + a whole pack of Camel Lights + fancy Canadian whisky + getting stoned + loud rock 'n' roll for five straight hours + going to bed at 5am on a Sunday = crap, am I tired.

Okay, today's plan: go see the rockumentary "Dig!" at the DIA at 4pm or 7pm tonight, then go see the Libertines and Radio 4 at the Magic Stick (doors at 8pm), then go to the afterparty for that show at the Eagle. Both bands will be DJing, as well as resident DJ Mike Trombly.

Word.

Hell City, We're Coming Home

I had the strangest experience today. I woke up, and wanted to go to the mall. Only because I know I need some new clothes, and I wanted lots of choices. I go to malls about once a year - if that. Seriously. It's just not my thing, that's all. Not my kinda place, if ya know what I mean. Shopping malls help me understand why I don't want to live in the suburbs. Malls show me how much I love the city. Detroit may be Hell City, but it's my city, I love it, and I should be supporting it instead of a pit of conformity like a shopping mall.

Neu!

A new way to waste time at work! Read what's there so far, then submit appropriate rants/essays/whatever to me. I will post almost anything. You can send them to stranded76@yahoo.com. Thank you, have a good day.

Viva la Revolución!

I know what you're thinking. Where's the rock? This is "rocknrollscientist.com," right? I know I've been a little lazy with the music lately, but my mind has been elsewhere. My friends opened a new bar, The Painted Lady, there's been all kinds of things going on in politics, and I've just been distracted in general. This week has been really light on the rock for me.

I've been listening to the new Faint album ("Wet From Birth" - Saddle Creek Records) lately. That's not really all that rock. It's more like what Duran Duran should've sounded like in 1986. Well, I wished Duran Duran would've sounded like that. Regardless, I like it, but it's not too rockin'.

I've also been listening to the most recent Kings of Convenience album ("Riot on an Empty Street" - Astralwerks Records). That is most definitely not rock. Their last album, "Quiet is the New Loud" was very folky with soft trumpet and drum accents. It was good, and very catchy yet still very downbeat. This new album is even more downbeat, but it's more folk. The first song, "Homesick" evokes Simon and Garfunkel right from the get-go. This is because unlike most KOC songs, both singers are singing in harmony at the bginning of the song. Very, very Simon and Garfunkel. The rest of the album isn't quite like that. There are light strings and gentle drums, and more trumpet just like the first album, but lyrically it's more upbeat. Leslie Feist from Broken Social Scene contributes backing vocals on a few tracks, too. Downbeat, but warm and comfortable. I like it.

I've also been listening to Blake Schwartzenbach a lot lately. This means I've been listening to Jawbreaker and Jets to Brazil. That man is a fucking genius when it comes to sharp wit. His words cut, but they don't go straight to the point. Kind of like Matt Skiba from Alkaline Trio. I guess these bands are all rock, but the influences of punk are there. I recommend "24 Hour Revenge Therapy" and "Dear You" (especially "Dear You") from Jawbreaker and "Orange Rhyming Dictionary" from Jets to Brazil. Over and out.

The Good, the Bad, and the Slimeballs

Ahhhh, yes, debate season is upon us. I thought it was especially interesting that in the post-debate roundup last night, two bloggers were interviewed. One liberal, and one conservative just to be fair. Wonkette and Power Line, respectively. Last January, when I started this site, I could not have imagined that Tom Brokaw would be on TV interviewing people who write about politics and culture online. Especially concerning something as important as Presidential/Vice Presidential debates. He was doing it for a good reason, though. The bloggers were already on their sites, posting fallacies before the debate was halfway over.

Just like the first Presidential debate, there was no clear winner here, but I think it's safe to say that John Edwards is at the very least much more of a gentleman than Tricky Dick Cheney (aforementioned slimeball) will ever be. Before his closing statement, Edwards thanked the Vice President and the debate moderator. Dick only thanked the moderator, and stopped abruptly after saying it. Like he was making a point of not thanking Edwards. Towards the beginning, Cheney attacked Edwards for his less-than-stellar attendance record in Congress. He said that he presides over Congress, and he's there every Tuesday when they're in session, but this (the debate) is the first time he's ever met Edwards. It seemed like a slick attack, but it's false. They've met three times before that, and Edwards' wife reminded Dick after the debate. His response? "Oh yeah." Check out ABC News for the full article on that mis-step.

Overall, no, I didn't see the whole thing, but it seemed like a wash anyway. For the first time in a long time, both Vice Presidential candidates are good speakers. They're both quick on their feet. Possibly quicker than their running mates. I just wonder if Edwards will hold the strings the same way Tricky Dick has for the past four years. Keep in mind that Edwards gained his fortune and senior partnership in his law firm by making a name for himself in the courtroom. He's a talker, it's what he does. His specialty in law is medical malpractice. Edwards won many large verdicts against obstetricians in North Carolina. One of the primary theories he invoked holds that cerebral palsy can be caused during delivery. Now critics are saying that theory was based on "junk science." So, this just shows that he's a good orator. He's one of those lawyers who can make a jury believe anything, even if there isn't much fact involved. As much as I believe that I would've voted for him if he was nominated to run for President, I still don't trust him.

1976*

Starting this Wednesday coming up (10/06/04), rocknrollscientist, aka DJ Gutterball will be DJing at the Painted Lady, Hamtramck's newest bar, located at 2930 Jacob, where Lili's used to be. Pints of PBR for $1.50 all the time. This will be every Wednesday. punk/rock/roll.

These are the kind of bands I'm thinking of:

Against Me!, Blood Brothers, Minutemen, Magazine, Mott the Hoople, David Bowie, Brian Eno, Spacemen 3, ACDC, Swingin' Utters, The Fall, The Damned, Joy Division, Cocksparrer, The Undertones, Thin Lizzy, The Testors, Human Eye, Gang of Four, Stiff Little Fingers, Turbonegro, Bang! Bang!, Black Flag, the Misfits, Descendents, The Slits, Dillinger Four, Wire, Murder City Devils, Buzzcocks, Troggs, The Dickies, Drive Like Jehu, Elvis Costello, Gorilla Biscuits, World's Fastest Car, Epoxies, Exploding Hearts, The Spits, Mission of Burma, Killing Joke, Nazis From Mars, Paybacks, Motley Crue, Guns 'n' Roses, Ted Leo, The Bronx, Against Me!, Agnostic Front, Cro Mags, Bad Brains, Backyard Babies, Weirdos, Bad Religion, The Clash, The Briefs, FM Knives, The Hellacopters, Gluecifer, Joe Strummer, Velvet Underground, Motorhead, Euroboys, The Move, The Business, Dead Boys, Pere Ubu, Pagans, The Saints, Electric Eels, PiL, Residents, Rocket From the Crypt, Rocket From the Tombs, Rocket Science, The Hives, Slade, Eddie & The Hot Rods, Rose Tattoo, The Soft Boys, The Adverts, The Drags, The Candy Snatchers, The Dirtys, Kinks, Sultans, Star Spangles, Thee Michelle Gun Elephant, Guitar Wolf, Alice Cooper, Dr. Feelgood

*the year I was born, and the year that punk broke

Heineken?!? Fuck that shit! Pabst Blue Ribbon.

It's days like today when I actually like my job. Last week, I covered for one of my bosses. If it was the one boss, it wouldn't be that bad, because he doesn't really do anything besides squint at Excel sheets on his computer. The other one has a ton of tedious bullshit to do everyday. That's the baws I covered for last week. I've covered for him many, many times in the past. I don't know why this week was any different. It actually wasn't that bad. I got some much needed overtime out of it, too. Anyhoo, today he stealthily gave me a case of PBR for helpin' him out. He had to do it secretly because this is a corporate office, regardless of the anti-professionalism that drips from this place. Either way, I'm pretty happy about it. Anyone want a beer?

What You Don't Know

Have you ever noticed that little button over on the left, below the list of links and archive links? It says "SITE METER." Obviously, it's a counter for the site. This is the cool thing, I can go to the site meter website, and check out all kinds of information on you people. Don't worry, it's nothing that isn't normally available. One thing that I like is that I can see what search strings people are using to find my site. So, without further ado, I give you a bunch of searches that bring you to this site. I'm not listing all of them here, but I think the most common search is for the word 'tetrafluoroethane'. Odd.

1. Jaime Easter + Pirhanas
2. Joe Lampinen
3. fucked + ass + girlgang + bang
4. mock-jargon + party
5. prostitutes + Sarnia + strip + club
6. tetrafluoroethane + petroleum + hydrocarbon
7. Japanese + punk rock
8. temperature + Sofia
9. Suicide Girls + Elara + free
10. huffing + tetrafluoroethane
11. Ghetto Recorders + Detroit, MI
12. Greenhornes + CDs for sale
13. Volt Records
14. techno music + listen + danger danger + fire in the disco
15. tetrafluorethane + Texas + dangerous drugs
16. "I said shit goddamn, I'm a man"
    

I Drink the Wine

Hey, I just wanted to let all of you know that the Painted Lady in Hamtramck is now looking for bands for shows. If you're in a band, or know someone who is, here's where to send your demos (vinyl, cassettes, and CDs accepted...hell, you can send a wax cylinder if you want):

(both of these addresses are for demos only)

lex luthor
264 holbrook
detroit mi, 48208

or:

lex c/o the painted lady
2930 jacob
hamtramck mi, 48212

contact: dickivy@twmi.rr.com

(for those from out of state, just to let you know, hamtramck is a square mile city that resides inside the city limits of detroit and houses more bars and drunk rock n' roll types than you can shake a stick at.)

Hail, hail, rock 'n' roll

With Head on Hands, and Name in Blood

I was going to paraphrase and comment on this recent column from Arianna Huffington, but I think I'll just post the whole thing. It stands well on its own. The column can be found on her site.

Bush's Toxic Campaign Mix: God, Country And Perpetual Fear
September 29, 2004

Leave no sucker punch unthrown. That seems to be the scorched earth mantra of the GOP campaign as it heads into the final rounds. But if you're thinking these guys can't go any lower, guess again. George Bush doesn't just have his head buried in the sand — he's let his integrity sink below sea level, as well.
The latest dirty blows are a contemptible one-two combination with which Team Bush has portrayed John Kerry as both the enemy of God and, if not exactly the ally of al-Qaida, then at least the terrorists' candidate of choice. To hear them tell it, a vote for Kerry is a vote against God and Country. Talk about hitting way, way below the belt.
Let's start with God.
It was revealed last week that the Republican Party has sent out an incendiary mass mailing warning that, if elected, "liberals" (and I'll give you one guess which presidential candidate that includes) will try to — I kid you not — ban the Bible.
The full-color flyer features a picture of the Bible with the word "Banned" stamped across it, and a photo of a man, on bended knee, placing a wedding band on the hand of another man, accompanied by the word "Allowed."
Clearly, Bush and the GOP have taken their Bible-thumping ways to a whole new level: Now they're using the Good Book to try to bash in the skulls of their opponents.
This "God is on our side" attack is all the more outrageous because it's not coming from some shadowy 527 committee that Bush can publicly — albeit disingenuously — distance himself from but, rather, from deep in the heart of the Bush-run Republican National Committee. The president's team has undoubtedly "approved this message."
They've also used the official Georgewbush.com campaign website to attack Kerry, a Catholic, as being "Wrong for Catholics", while an RNC website, KerryWrongForCatholics.com, slams him for not being loyal enough to the Pope. We've certainly come a long way since another JFK had to assure voters in 1960 that he wouldn't take orders from the Vatican.
The idea that Kerry and the Democrats are anti-Bible and that Bush has a hot line to The Man Upstairs is both offensive and patently absurd. One look at the latest statistics showing the rise in the number of Americans living in poverty proves that Republicans — who, contrary to their claims, do not hold a copyright on the Bible — have grotesquely perverted its core teachings.
As Rev. Jim Wallis, the editor of Sojourners magazine, told me: "It's a bitter irony: these people accuse Democrats of wanting to ban the Bible, then proceed to utterly ignore the vast majority of its contents when it comes to questions of social justice, war and peace, and protecting the environment."
Perhaps the holy rollers in the Bush camp should crack open a Bible and see what it has to say about caring for the poor (Matthew 25:40), caring for the Earth (Genesis 2:15), and caring for human rights (Genesis 1:27). I've got a hunch Jesus wouldn't be too thrilled with Bush's first term.
And while they're acquainting themselves with the Book they purport to defend, the Bushies might also want to have a look at John 8:32 to see what it has to say about the moral imperative of telling the truth. Instead, they are doing everything in their power to convince nervous voters that a vote for John Kerry is a vote for another 9/11. It's the latest vile twist in the Bush-Cheney "all fear, all the time" campaign strategy, and the last desperate gasp of an administration utterly clueless about how to actually win the war on terror.
The fear-mongering has been relentless and revolting — bottoming out with a sewer-level attack ad put together by a 527 largely financed by a pair of longtime Bush-backers. The TV spot shows pictures of Osama bin Laden, 9/11 hijacker Mohammed Atta, the Chechen school murderers, and the Madrid train bombings and asks: "These people want to kill us. Would you trust Kerry up against these fanatic killers?"
Somewhere — and I don't think it's heaven — Lee Atwater is smiling.
And lest you think this line of attack doesn't have the Karl Rove seal of approval, just look at the long line of Bush surrogates lining up to parrot the "al-Qaida wants Kerry to win" talking point — including Sen. Orrin Hatch, the increasingly embarrassing House Speaker Dennis Hastert, Deputy Secretary of State Richard Armitage, and the hatchet-man-in-chief, Dick Cheney. They've all been echoing Hatch's claim that terrorists "are going to throw everything they can between now and the election to try and elect Kerry."
What's next, a photo of Abu Musab al-Zarqawi sporting a Kerry-Edwards campaign button?
This "terrorists for Kerry" routine is as laughable as it is loathsome. Why in the world would the terrorists want to get rid of George Bush? He is their dream president, after all: a man who has alienated our allies, isolated us and united the Muslim world against us.
The president's preemptive invasion of Iraq has been such a boon to al-Qaida that the British ambassador to Italy called him the terrorist organization's "best recruiting sergeant." Even Bush's good buddy, Pakistani President Musharraf (a guy who can't afford to share W's delusions when it comes to matters of security), said last week that the war in Iraq has made the world "more dangerous" and "further complicated" the war on terror.
Of course, the spinmeisters in the Bush camp would rather you never hear any of this, which is why they've been so quick to smear as unpatriotic anyone painting a less than rosy picture of Iraq — going so far as to imply that Kerry, by merely questioning the president's policies, has given aid and comfort to our enemies.
What a load of gutless garbage. As Thomas Jefferson made clear, "Dissent is the highest form of patriotism." But Bush can't seem to grasp that this country is too strong to be endangered by the truth — and that, indeed, hiding the truth, the hallmark of his administration, is what is making us weaker and less secure.I know the president hates to read, but with the debates looming, maybe he should dust off his library card and brush up on his American history. And on the Bible.

It's time to choose

I think that more than ever, this is a time to look back to brother J.C. Crawford's speech which opened the MC5's show at the Grande Ballroom in Detroit on the Zenta New Year, in 1968. That was a time of serious political unrest that was expressed heavily in the culture of the times. Now, however, is a much more serious situation. Everything that got better (possibly because of all the late '60s activism) is now getting worse again. It will only continue unless you stand up and vote. Let your voice be heard! It's time to testify!

"Brothers and sisters! I wanna see a sea of hands out there. Let me see a sea of hands. I want everybody to kick up some noise. I wanna hear a little revolution. Brothers and sisters, the time has come for each and every one of you to decide whether you are gonna be the problem, or whether you are gonna be the solution. You must choose, brothers, you must choose. It takes five seconds, five seconds of decision. Five seconds to realize that it's time to move. It's time to get down with it. Brothers, it's time to testify, and I want to know are you ready to testify? Are you ready?"

Brother Crawford was just giving an emphatic and emotional introduction to the most important band in Detroit at the time. He was expressing the power of the MC5 in speech. Words like those aren't taken lightly, though. Sounding like a Southern Baptist preacher, he gets his point across. It isn't just about the music or the band or 1968. It is time for a revolution. Vote!

Stoned Slackers?

Okay, I'm sure a lot of you out there watch The Daily Show on Comedy Central once in awhile. Yes, much of it is satirical, but there is real news and real commentary going on there, it's just wrapped up in comedy and wit so it's easier to swallow. The polar opposite of The Daily Show would be Bill O'Reilly's The O'Reilly Factor on Fox. O'Reilly is commonly known to most of us as an ultra-right wing wacko who is the born/sworn enemy of liberal columnist and personality Al Franken. I mean, really, some of the things that come out of O'Reilly's mouth are just so baffling. Earlier this month, Daily Show host Jon Stewart appeared on The O'Reilly Factor as a guest. Ya know what Billy said to him? He said this "You know what's really frightening?" O'Reilly said. "You actually have an influence on this presidential election. That is scary, but it's true. You've got stoned slackers watching your dopey show every night and they can vote." Guess what, Billy? Comedy Central was so ticked off at that comment, that they went and did a study on the two shows' audiences. They found that Daily Show viewers are more likely than O'Reilly Factor viewers to have completed four years of college. Ya know what they also found? Viewers of the Daily Show are more likely to correctly answer political questions than young people who don't. It seems that all of these neo-cons out there like O'Reilly really don't understand us. Why is it that the protests at this year's Republican National Convention were the biggest ever? The last time anything even remotely like that happened was at the Democratic National Convention in Chicago in 1968, and it wasn't nearly as big as what happened in NYC this year. There's just so much protest action lately, it's insane. I can't keep up with all of it. This past Sunday, there was an anti-Bush bike rally on Belle Isle (Detroit), a silent protest at 9 Mile and Woodward in Ferndale (Detroit-area) put on by Veterans for Peace, and soon there will be an anti-Bush film festival downtown. Maybe the IMF protests and Seattle and Genoa and Goteburg were all just the beginning of a world-wide awakening. These activist groups have been bubbling under for years, and now they have REAL issues to fight over, they have serious goals. The young liberal cannot be avoided, neo-cons...watch out!

Ah, Mercury...Sweetest of the Transition Metals!

As you can see, I've made some changes here. I really liked the black background, but it was hard to read. The font in the blog posts is a little bigger, too. Another change is the little envelope symbol at the end of each post. If you click on that, it will let you email that particular post to anyone you want. Let me know what you think, I'm still customizing it little by little, and trying to familiarize myself (yet again) with CSS.

To Live and Learn

Lessons learned today:

1. "Everything bagels" - are they really worth it? Half of that crap falls off into the toaster, which unleases that awful burnt garlic smell. The other half of the crap gets stuck in your teeth when you're eating the bagel. Not worth it.

2. "Pentax Optio S4" - yes, this is a bad-ass digital camera. Yes, there are lots of options including black and white and white-balance control. Yes, it's so small it fits in an Altoids tin perfectly. Yes, the rechargeable battery seems to last forever. Yes, it's 4 megapixels. Yes, there's a 4x digital zoom and macro and super-macro functions. Unfortunately, the highest shutter speed is ISO 200. No high-speed photography happenin' here . Not particularly good for high-quality rock 'n' roll live onstage when yr right next to the PA. Secondly, the innovative sliding-lens design which is the reason the camera can be so small creates lots of problems. This is not a perfect technology. Most of the people who buy this camera have had no problem, but many have. These problems usually include fun things like the camera won't always turn on or won't always turn off, or the camera will turn on, the lens will open, then the camera turns off without retracting the lens. All on it's own. Sometimes, when the camera is on, and you go to use the zoom function, it just turns off, sometimes without retracting the lens. Considering this is a $400 camera, I'm a little pissed, because I am one of those people with this problem. Even more reason to be pissed is that from reading Pentax user forums, I've found that if you send the camera back to Pentax (still under warranty), they will fix it, but they will charge you roughly $144 because they claim it's "operator error" or "operator inflicted impact damage." There are people on these forums who have had their cameras for less than a week, barely used them, and then had these problems. Pentax still will not offer any refunds or free repairs and the model has been out for over a year. That's probably why they don't make it anymore. Sometimes, some things are too good to be true. That's what I've learned today with this camera. If you're in my shoes with this particular Pentax camera, sometimes if you just hit it while it's turned off and the lens is retracted, it will work again just fine. There's no way I'm sending it in to have Pentax tell me it's my fault. Fuck that.

3. There are too many damned shows this weekend. I can't go to all of them. Another lesson learned. Ya can't be everywhere at once. Tonight, there's Sonny Vincent (formerly of NYC punk legends The Testors) with Dead Moon (legendary Pacific Northwest garage rock) at the Magic Stick. At Alvin's, Avail is playing with Only Crime, Jericho, and the Whiskey Diaries. Your last destination for tonight should be The Painted Lady, Detroit's newest bar. Look below to the previous post for details on who all's playin'. Five bucks to get in. That grand opening event will continue tomorrow night, when there's lots more to do, and lots more bands. The Lager House will have Capitol Cities, the Nice Device, and Fifth Period Fever. Also on Saturday will be the inaugural show at the White Heather club, which is located behind Como's in Ferndale. The Holy Fire and Sleep At Last will be playing as well as a third TBA band. Doors at 6pm, $5 cover, all ages show, and sadly for some, no alcohol. The Magic Stick has Natives of the New Dawn, who have been described as a cross between Tribe Called Quest and Medeski Martin & Wood. Dubphonics, Colic, and SA and Tenacity are also playing. Doors at 9pm, cover $7, 18+ only. Same night, Saturday, in the Garden Bowl is DJ Gutterball, also known as yours truly. No cover all night. I play from 9pm to 2am. If I could be everywhere at once...totally omnipresent, I would be at all of these shows, but I will be chained to the DJ booth at the GB as usual.

It's Official

I know...Sonny Vincent and Dead Moon are playing Friday. So are the Tiny Steps, and somewhere is the Nice Device. I know. But...you can see most of those acts anytime. What you can't see anytime is the grand opening of Detroit's newest bar: the Painted Lady. If you scroll down a little ways, you can see my previous article about the new bar. Joe and Andy's opening weekend will feature live music from Human Eye, the Terrible Twos, and the Genders on Friday the 24th. The Go are supposed to play that night as well, but word on the street is that it might not happen, so a replacement is TBA. Saturday the 25th, will be The Valentinos, Tentacle Lizardo, Little Claw and Whores of Babylon. If you were at Joe Lampinen's birthday two years ago at the Garden Bowl, then you've seen the Whores of Babylon. Good Dead Boys punk from Grand Rapids (I think they're from Grand Rapids). Both nights are $5, doors at 9pm. Beers on tap all the time, not just right now are Pabst Blue Ribbon, Bass, Boddington's, and Guinness. Pints of PBR are always $1.50, and 8 oz shells of PBR are always .75 cents. The address is 2390 Jacob in Hamtramck. Phone number is 313 874 2991.

The End is Near

Enjoy it while you can...

my backyard in Detroit:

Birth from Wet

...no, the warm coffee-flavored water did not help. Neither did the real coffee that I made after that. I'm looking, but who's looking back at me?

Gripped By the Lips

Weak coffee has no place in the office. Okay, better yet, weak coffee has no place in my mouth. Ever. If I can pick up the pot, and see through the coffee, I'm dumping it. End of story. Be warned! If you are going to make coffee for anyone other than yourself, have some consideration for those of us who actually like the taste of coffee. If I wanted warm coffee-flavored water, I'd drink Sanka.

Wet From Birth

I disappear today. I don't know how or why, but I do. I'm feeling crippled somehow. Physically, I'm fine, not any unhealthier than normal. I have noticed that I've lost weight, so that's good (too bad I can't afford to go out and buy some clothes that fit). It's something in my head, and it's hitting me all over. I probably just need coffee. That, or a complete overhaul of my life. While I do have job security, it's a tedious and boring job, and I hope to not be here within a year. I also hope to be in Europe within five years. Not just vacation, I mean I hope to be living in Europe within five years. The question is where and how. Money's also been on my mind lately. I guess that ties in with the shitty job. All of these things, as well as affairs of the heart make me feel weak. I do too many things in the name of romantic idealism. I feel like driving to Chicago right now and making a visit I shoulda made a long time ago. It won't help anything, but I'll feel better.

Drunken Detroit

What's wrong with me? The Detroit area's newest bar has been open for two weeks, and I have failed to mention it. Even stranger is that I'm friends with the owners, and I still haven't said anything. Well, ladies and worms...it's about damn time I said something. The Painted Lady is in Hamtramck in the space where Lilli's 21 used to be. Not positive of the address, but I know it's on Jacob. The corner of Jacob and Joseph Campau is right across from the Food Basics plaza (formerly Farmer Jack). Unfortunately, Jacob is a one way street, and runs west into Campau, but you can deal with that. The bar is painted a bright royal blue color, and not hard to find. The owners, Joe Lampinen and Andy Dow have every right to be opening their own bar. They already have a regular crowd, and if anyone knows anything about bars and bartending, it's Joe. Pints of Pabst Blue Ribbon are ALWAYS $1.50, that's not a special deal, it is not limited, and it is not just available while supplies last. Eight ounce shells of PBR are also available for .75 cents. Other beers on tap include Bass, Harp, and Boddington's. Several beers domestic and import are available as well as the usual liquors, Rebel Yell included. They will be having shows there, but that doesn't start until the grand opening weekend, September 24th and 25th. Between the two nights there will be several bands including the Go, the Valentinos, and Human Eye. Keep in mind, too, that unlike Lilli's, the entrance to the Painted Lady is right in front (on Jacob), not at the side down that dark sketchy alleyway. The bar is open seven days a week, and is open from 4pm to 2am.

(Joe/Stacey/Andy: if I got any of that wrong, let me know)

I'm a Dirty Motherfucker

...dirty jeans and a dirty mind!

So, today I got a new CD in the mail. I can't remember the chain of events that led me to order it, but I did (maybe because every other sentence in Horizontal Action references Jay Reatard). It's the album "Grown Up, Fucked Up" from the Reatards. This shit is serious. Serious hate and rage-filled trash and roll. It came out back in 2000, but it's just as relevant now as it was then. Four years ago, I was in a position to actually hang out with and meet all kinds of people in today's garage rock elite (not just Detroit). So I did. Some of the coolest people I got to meet were the guys from the Compulsive Gamblers/Oblivians. These guys are from Memphis, just like the Reatards, except Jay Reatard was 17 when he recorded, sang and played guitar on this record. The guys from the Oblivians are in their 30s. The trash blues raw dirt-ass hate is still there on both sides of the fence. It makes me want to move to Memphis. Okay, not really. This record from the Reatards is just so trashy and mean. It's angry. I love it. Why do I like so much of this music, this dirty trashy punk rock 'n' roll? Is this the white man's soul music? Actually, yes, it is. It's not the anger, it's the emotive vocals, and the emotion in the voice. Not emotional like 'emo'. Fuck that. This is real emotion. No one's crying here. They're screaming. They're screaming cuz their cheating girlfriend broke up with them, they're screaming cuz they're broke and the rent's due, they're screaming cuz they need a beer to forget about their problems, they're screaming cuz they haven't gotten laid in a month, they're screaming cuz no one understands them. They got issues, and they're gonna let you know in the most emphatic way they can. This music is always rough, often it sounds angry even if it really isn't, but it just feels so right. I'm not a violent man. I don't get in fights. I think the last time I hit someone with the intent of hurting them, it was my sister, and I was 10 years old. I guess I'm a pacifist, and I believe in the power of words over fists. So, this trash lets me live out my violence vicariously. I highly suggest that if any of this interests you, you should go out and find any album you can from The Reatards, The Compulsive Gamblers, The Oblivians, The Dirtys, The Drags, The Atomic Fireballs, okay, just go and buy everything on Empty Records, In the Red Records, anything on Crypt Records, and Estrus Records. That should cover it. Basically, I'm talking about the garage rock that had balls, not just the blues. Real fucking raw power.

I Don't Wanna Go Down to the Basement

Three fairly random yet interesting things I've heard in the past 24 hours:

1. "I called all the fags, but they were out of service"

2. "Wanna have sex?" "Sure, I have nothing better to do"

3. "There's about 50 guys playing bagpipes in the parking lot at Circuit City by Tel-12 right now."

I just felt the need to share, that's all. Have a nice day.

I Wanna Live!

Damn. Johnny Ramone is dead. Here's the full story from Yahoo! news:

CHRIS T. NGUYEN, Associated Press Writer

LOS ANGELES - Johnny Ramone, guitarist and co-founder of the seminal punk band "The Ramones" that influenced a generation of rockers, has died. He was 55.

Ramone, who had been fighting a five-year battle with prostate cancer, died in his sleep Wednesday afternoon at his Los Angeles home surrounded by friends and family, said the band's longtime artistic director Arturo Vega. "He was the guy with a strategy. He was the guy who not only looked after the band's interest but he also was their defender," Vega said in a telephone interview from New York.
Ramone, whose birth name is John Cummings, had been hospitalized in June at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center.
Johnny Ramone was one of the original members of the struggling Ramones, whose hit songs "I wanna be sedated" and "Blitzkrieg Bop," among others, earned them an induction into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame in 2002.
Johnny Ramone co-founded "The Ramones" in 1974 in New York along with singer Joey Ramone, bassist DeeDee Ramone and drummer Tommy Ramone, who is the only surviving member of the original band. All four band members had different last names, but took the common name Ramone.
Joey Ramone, whose real name is Jeff Hyman, died in 2001 of lymphatic cancer. Dee Dee Ramone, whose real name is Douglas Colvin, died from a drug overdose in 2002.
Clad in leather jackets and long black mops of hair, the group started out in legendary New York clubs like CBGB and Max's Kansas City, where they blasted their rapid-fire songs.
Since its debut album in 1976, the band struggled for commercial success, but they left a formidable imprint on the rock genre. Though they never had a Top 40 song, the Ramones influenced scores of followers, including bands such as Green Day and Nirvana.
Even Bruce Springsteen was moved. After seeing the Ramones in Asbury Park, N.J., Springsteen wrote "Hungry Heart" for the band. His manager, however, swayed him to keep the song for himself and it became a hit single.
The band had encounters with other big names, including producer Phil Spector, who collaborated with the band in 1980. During the session, the late bassist Dee Dee Ramone said Spector pulled a gun on the band.
"The Ramones had it rough," said Vega, who's worked with the band for 30 years. "The band almost had to be protected from people who were taking advantage of them. There was never any money made."
Johnny Ramone changed that by demanding more money for performances, but still kept a close watch on the band's budget; Vega recalled how Johnny Ramone would insist that the band drive nonstop between Boston and New York for shows instead of spending the night in a hotel.
In addition to his financial conservatism, the guitarist was politically conservative — the late Ronald Reagan was Ramone's favorite president, Vega said.
Fans have remained loyal to the Ramones, and the Ramones over the years have been loyal to their fans. In 1979, while shooting scenes for the film "Rock 'n' Roll High School," the Ramones — ignoring the director's order — played a concert-length session for fans who had paid to be extras, Vega said.
"The Ramones never ever lost their image, their aura of being the ultimate underdog, the voice of the angry young man," Vega said.
A tribute concert and cancer research fund-raiser was held Sunday in Los Angeles to celebrate the band's 30th anniversary. It featured performances from Los Angeles punk band X, the Red Hot Chili Peppers, Henry Rollins and others.

Along with his wife, Linda Cummings, Johnny Ramone was surrounded at his death by friends, including Pearl Jam rocker Eddie Vedder, singer Rob Zombie and others. Other friends who gathered at his Los Angeles home included Lisa Marie Presley, Pete Yorn, Vincent Gallo and Talia Shire.
He is survived by his wife and his mother, Estelle Cummings. He will be cremated during a private ceremony.

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