8.31.2004

RNC Not Welcome

For those not aware, the Republican National Convention is going on right now, as I type this in New York City. On the first day, Sunday, August 30, almost 500,000 people marched in unified protest against George W. Bush, the "war" (read: occupation) in Iraq, tax breaks for the rich, and the presence of the RNC in a city that is so well-known for being mostly Democrat. I think it's important to note that there were almost as many protesters as there are registered Republican voters in NYC. In a city of 8 million people, 16% of the people are Republican. That's it. Only 16% actually care about this convention. There have been all sorts of violent and mostly non-violent protests since Sunday, and they will continue all throughout the week. The IndyMedia center in NYC has a great site chronicling everything going on there. Check it out.



I Am a Cracked Machine

Coming soon to a blog near you (this one, specifically): reviews of the new Mooney Suzuki record, "Alive and Amplified," the new Joan of Arc record "Joan of Arc, Dick Cheney, Mark Twain...," the second compilation of demos from the Lost Sounds, "Demos II," and a brief discussion of my obsession with the band Brainiac.



8.26.2004

The Selection Drone

Go here, and listen to Vancouver's answer to bad Peter Murphy solo albums, the Fall no longer being relevant, and pathetic wannabes like Hot Hot Heat. Radio Berlin is the real thing, and they were doing it long before Interpol decided to rip off Joy Division to get famous.




8.20.2004

Conference Calls and Rug Burns

As I've stated many, many times before, I work in an office. Not just any office. I can't tell you the name of the company, because I never truly know who's reading this, and I say things that could get me fired. I do things that could get me fired. I shoulda been fired three years ago. I stroll in at least ten minutes late every day. Grinding and brewing coffee is more important than answering the phone most of the time. There are mutated green plastic army men on top of my computer monitor. They're mutated because I had a small torch, a utility knife, time, Krazy glue, and the dark motivation that comes from deep within to cut off several tiny heads and glue them all onto one soldier's shoulder. I use cans of compressed air to clean my desk because I'm too lazy to just wipe it down. There's a spot on the side of my mouse that's all worn smooth from my thumb resting there constantly. My gel-filled wrist-wrest has indents because my fingers sit on the home-row at all times. Those little ridges that are usually on the 'F' and 'J' keys are non-existent. The carpet in the narrow space behind my desk is littered with rubber bands from rubber-band fights. My mad Romanian co-worker calls them "gum bands." European people are funny. I have a wooden ruler in my desktop caddy that says the name of my company "= EVIL" in red Sharpie. The carpet is stained all throughout the office. The stench of stale cigarettes lingers in the shipping area. One time, I talked a co-worker into standing on the forks of the forklift while I raised it all the way to the top of the 20-foot ceiling. He was so close to the top that he had to crouch down to fit between the forks and the corrugated metal. I left him there for ten minutes. Maybe I'm the one who's evil. One summer afternoon saw me and a co-worker driving around Southfield, still on the clock, hitting a bong and laughing our asses off. Out in back, there are dumpster kitties that are more important to me than the bullshit conference calls that last two hours too long where some Executive Vice President rambles on about accountability, and his yes-men talk about the weather or repeat the same stupid problem or question over and over again, ad nauseum. I DON'T FUCKING CARE IF IT'S RAINING IN WILMINGTON, OHIO, YOU FUCKS! The multi-colored paperclips just started talking again. They've been quiet for a couple months. I wish they'd shut up.


8.16.2004

Olympia

Here's something interesting from the Guardian Unlimited:

Beggars and drug addicts disappear in Athens 'clean-up' before games

Helena Smith in Athens

Wednesday August 11, 2004 Last-ditch efforts to "clean up" Athens before the Olympic games begin on Friday have included removing thousands of immigrants, beggars, drug addicts and homeless people from the capital's streets.
Human rights activists said yesterday that they feared vulnerable people, including asylum seekers from war-torn countries such as Iraq, were falling victim to the campaign.
In the count-down to the games about 70,000 police and military personnel have been drafted to patrol the capital.
"There is a climate of absolute terror on the streets," said Spyros Psychas, a member of Arsis, a charity working with the homeless and underprivileged youth.
"People are afraid. They're ringing in saying how unbearable the police controls have become."
Underlining the concern, the UN High Commissioner for Refugees urged the Greek government to ensure that "international standards", including the Geneva conventions, were not being breached.
The agency's unusual intervention followed reports in the Greek media that mass deportations had soared in advance of the games.
Last weekend the authoritative Ta Nea reported that of the 13,766 immigrants arrested in the first six months of this year about 6,623 had been forced to leave Greece.
Lawyers told the Guardian that they believed growing numbers of foreigners had been banished in recent weeks under fast-track procedures which allowed them no chance to appeal. Asylum seekers in Greece are often forced to wait months before being given proper papers.
"Recent reports regarding the 'clearing' of the streets of Athens ... create concern," the UNHCR's Athens branch said in a statement.
"Many asylum seekers lack proper identification documents and are at risk of arrest, detention and possible deportation in contravention of international standards."
As the organisers have completed the building of venues and other Olympic sites, they have turned their attention to beautifying the capital. The effort has focused on the historic centre, not least the squares where thousands of immigrant street sellers, drug users and homeless people tend to gather.
Partly because of its strategic geographic location and poverty, Greece has a large number of socially excluded people. The European Observatory on Homelessness believes that about 17,000 people are without a roof, not counting the majority of the immigrants who cross the Greek borders daily.
A lot of "undesirables" are thought to have been moved on to less visible districts.
Some people are thought to have been put in psychiatric institutions where doctors have complained of being deluged with sectioning orders from public prosecutors.
In June the staff at the Dromokaition psychiatric hospital, one of Athens' two mental institutions, protested on the streets.
Michalis Yannakos, leader of the hospital's trade union, said at the time: "Following arrests, the prosecutor issues sectioning orders that force us to lock up drug addicts, alcoholics or mentally ill people."
Psychiatrists told the Guardian that many of the capital's burgeoning population of drug users had mysteriously disappeared.
The authorities deny that the police have conducted a sweep, saying that no group had been deliberately targeted.



I Had Too Much to Dream Last Night

From time to time, I have no time. Lately, I've been struggling to post new stuff here for your slacking-from-work enjoyment, but I got shit goin' on, ya know? So, occasionally, I feel the need to remind you of all the links over there on the left-hand side. They're all good, I wouldn't post 'em if they weren't. There's music, art, politics, mixtures of all three, architecture, news, food, interweb dorkness, other blogs, literature, anarchy, and science. Really, there's something for everyone. All links are highly recommended, so the next time you come here, and I haven't posted anything new, check out the links. I'm positive you'll find something interesting that I advocate.


Fight Night at the Bill Hicks Resurrection Labs

Recently, a friend of mine has been bugging me to go to our high school ten-year reunion. I will not give in. I will not go. I won't be explaining why I'm not going, I'm just not. Not interested. Most of the people I'd like to talk to, I'm already in contact with. But, in my friend's latest plea for my attendance, she mentioned an old friend of mine, and gave me the URL to his website. His name's Buddy, and I suggest you check out his site. He's a comedian now, hopefully, he'll be playing somewhere near you soon. I haven't talked to him in a long time, but I always knew comedy was his calling.


8.14.2004

Hot.Night.Crash

Wow, it's been a long freakin' time since I've posted. You get no apologies from me, people. Life moves in interesting ways sometimes, and mine is currently moving in the best of ways. This means I'm busy.

I can do this: pocket reviews. The latest album from Sweden's Sahara Hotnights is hot. That's hot with two 't's: HOTT. Never mind the lazy critics who like to toss of comments like "they're the Swedish Donnas," or the "female Hives." That's all bullshit. The Donnas haven't sounded this good in years, and they can't pull this off. The Hives? Gimme a break. Just because both bands are Swedish and play rock 'n' roll is no reason to pigeonhole them like that. The new album, "Kiss and Tell" is a bit different from their first album, "Jennie Bomb." That record was straight up rock and/or roll. This one could easiest be described as The Runaways covering Blondie with keyboards supplied by The Cars. Make sense? No? Well, it should. Yes, it's derivative, and no, it's not much of an improvement on the last album (which was truly rockin'), but I can't stop listening to it. Also, some lazy writers would like to say that the singer has no grasp of the English language, but I don't think we're talkin' about the same record. Seriously. At no point in this album can you tell that the band is Swedish. If you look at the liner notes, you see a lot of Swedish names, but the music itself is solid, with no accent. Next review will be "Who is This America?" from Antibalas.


8.08.2004

Half-Assed Music Review

So, kids, have ya heard the new Hives rekkid? Most of you probably think that the last album, "Veni Vidi, Vicious" was their first one. WRONG. Now, you're probably thinking that it was their best one. ALSO WRONG. Alright, so they had a couple of albums before "VVV," and they were okay. Very rockin', very New Bomb Turks/Crypt Records wannabes. Very, very New Bomb Turks wannabes. That is not the sound of "VVV" or the new one at all. The last album was very poppy, fulla hooks, and quite rockin'. Every song was a winner, even the Curtis Mayfield cover (?!?). This new one, "Tyrannosaurus Hives" blows away "Veni Vidi Vicious." Seriously. Now, you might listen to it at first, and think "this blows," or "it's not as good as the last one." Hold on, there, bub. Listen to it again. Maybe even a third or fourth time. Think about it. The production isn't as slick, the songs are not instant hits, but they're good. So good. Even the Who and James Brown/Screamin' Jay ripoffs are hot. This is a serious album. After the last album, I almost got tired of them. I expected them to pull a Strokes, and put out a second big album with more of the same old, same old. No dice, man. This shit isn't too far removed from "VVV," but there's more meat, a lot more going on. And ya know what? Most stores are selling it for only $10 right now. You could go and set up a download and wait anywhere from an hour to two days for it to finish, or you could just go to your local record shop, pick it up, go without booze for one day, sit back and enjoy. Do it!



Everything...

I know, I've been copping out the past few days on here. Sorry, Eli. I know you come here for something interesting to read, and then I totally drop the ball. I have been busy, and I do have a lot going on right now. Those of you who have known me for the seven years that I've lived in Detroit may realize that I'm in a situation now that I've never really been in since living here. It's a good thing, and it's taking up some of my time. I've been pre-occupied, distracted. But it's a good distraction. Bad choice of words, she's much more than a distraction to me.


8.07.2004

Yup

Believe it or not, everything sucks even less than it did the last time I posted. I'm currently not available, please leave a message. BEEP!


8.05.2004

Everything Does Not Suck Today

That's all I have to say. Everything is quite good right now. Have a nice day.



8.01.2004

Everything Sux Today*

I know, you're probably sick of every other post on here being an apology from me about not posting enough. Well ya know what? Suck it! It's summer, I just quit smoking, I've been busy, I got shit to do, and I just haven't had much time. Here's something, though. It might become a regular feature. I'm reviewing local 24 hour restaurants.

Last night, my accomplice and I found ourselves hungry at 2am. We were in Ferndale, and weren't sure where to go. We wanted to avoid any place that would be too busy, but we didn't want to go too far away, either. So, first place we tried was Berkley Coney in Berkley. It's a shithole, don't bother. After about ten minutes (in which time we spotted a grasshopper on the table, and noticed that our menus had spooge all over them), we realized that it must be a 'self-serve' coney island (even though it really wasn't), and decided to get the hell out. Our window was open, and we jumped through. Next stop, the Del Mar in Royal Oak. This was much better. From the outside, it looked like it would be just as bad as the previous shit hole, but it was actually very clean, the staff was very attentive. This is the kind of place where the waitresses are like ninjas when pouring the coffee...you blink, and your cup is full. The food was good, too. Not spectacular, but hey what do you expect out of a 24 hour diner in the suburbs of Detroit?


7.29.2004

Cock Ring Warehouse Liquidation Sale

Latest example of potential porn found in everyday life: the Juicy Fruit flavor, Strappleberry.  Picture that name in lights (or at least on the box of the latest strap-on fetish girl-on-girl AVN Top 10 hit): Strappleberry Jones and the Temple of Poon.  By the way, the actual gum tastes like rancid Nerds.  Highly not recommended.
 


This Here's Marrrlboro Country

As I said earlier this week, I quit smoking on Monday. As of right now, I'm just short of 68 hours smoke-free. For me, this is a serious, serious achievement. I never wanted it bad enough before, or I would be doing it for someone else, then they started smoking again, and I said fuck it, or I just didn't feel like I really wanted to quit. I'll be honest, it really is like a fog has been lifted. I don't mean to get all hokey on you, but really, this is weird. Obviously, I can smell better...I don't think my nose has been this clear in a very, very long time. I haven't noticed it yet, but apparently my sense of taste will improve (or return, at least), and my clothes will stop smelling like smoke. My car won't smell like smoke, my mustache will not smell like smoke (when I have one). Here's a new reality discovered after quitting, and this comes from a friend who just quit last week. She said she feels like a fog has been lifted, and she explained that a little more last night. Now it makes complete sense, and she's absolutely right. If you're a smoker, I know you've done this, in fact, I'm positive. Smoking can be used to avoid a situation. Most of the time, the situation is conflict, confrontation, or intimacy. Wow, do I ever know the reality of all three. So what do you do when you no longer have cigarettes to help you run away? Confront. At least, that's what I'll do, and I'm thinking I'm going to be a lot happier because of it.


Who's On First?

Last night, an interesting conversation came up. Have you ever thought about midwiffery? Yes, I said it: midwhiffery. I'm referring to midwifin'. This is real, there are actually people out there who do this. I guess the spelling could go either way. I think it's more fun if you get the 'h' involved, because then it sounds like something involving whiffle ball. It does, kinda. A midwife is someone who helps a new mother have her baby in the comfort of her own home, or wherever it is that she wants to have the baby. Apparently, even though the practice is very old, it's starting to get common again. It seems that one who midwifes can be considered a 'catcher'. In fact, this is the term used to describe the act of, uh, receiving. So, does this mean that the father is the pitcher? Or is he the outfielder? These questions baffle me. The catcher is the whiffer, in a sense the mother is the batter (because she's throwin' the ball), a home-run is a successful hit, a c-section is a walk, and a foul ball is just too depressing to be discussing in this article. I was just thinking...if two men want to have a baby, do they get a designated hitter to step in? And what about midwives who 'catch' their own babies, would this be autowiffery?


why don't you quit smoking, and see what kind of nonsense comes out of your sleep-deprived mind?

7.27.2004

Have You Ever Seen "Vision Quest?"

That question was overheard today at work.  Being said, it can only mean a few things.  Unfortunately, this time it means that the ladies are listening to old Madonna in the office today.  Considering that it's now been a little over twenty-six hours since I quit smoking, my normal tolerance for subpar '80s pop music is not at it's usual level.  I may soon step on someone's throat, and I think I know whose.  My supervisor was supposed to be out all of last week, then yesterday and today.  As usual, he came back a day early.  I strolled in about 10 minutes late, thinking nothing of it, and suddenly I start getting interrogated.  He already knows the answers to the questions, he only asks them to make sure I was doing my job (and his) while he was gone.  It's so absurd, it makes me feel like I'm in grade school or something. 

 

7.26.2004

...when you start drowning in an open tab, and your judgement's on the brink

Argh.  Can anyone out there say malaise, boys and girls?  This is what I'm feeling.  Since 9:30pm last night (Sunday), I have only had three cigarettes.  This....is because I have quit smoking.  I've been a smoker ever since that one day in 1993, when I was out with my friend Ray, and I actually said, "hey, let's go to 7-11 and get some cigarettes, I wanna try that."  Seriously.  I actually said that.   So, I got a pack of Pall Malls, because that's what I remember my dad smoking, and I liked the smell of the smoke when I was little.  Of course, I gagged and coughed the first time I lit up.  I think it wasn't until about ten cigarettes, and about a week later before the first time that I actually inhaled properly.  Cigarette buzz....ahhhhhh.  I haven't had that feeling in a real long time.  This is so hard.  I've said "I'm quitting" a million times, only to wake up the next morning, drive straight to the gas station and buy a pack.  Or, I've been in the car and just got so sick of it, that I tossed a pack out the window.  That's been happening ever since the first week, up until just last month.  Yet, here I sit smoke free right now, so that's good.  I suppose it doesn't help that I've had some things going on in my life lately that would normally make me want to smoke: nerves, stress, anxiety, hating work, anxiety...but I guess all that's just part of quitting right?  Whatever.  I want to try to stop taking years off my life, I want my sense of smell, I want to taste food for real.  There's so much food I've never tasted without being a smoker.  I think I might have a perpetual sinus infection, too, this might help stop that.  A friend who quit just last week told me that she felt like she just came out of a twelve-year fog by quitting...she's been walking around her house smelling everything, because she's never really known how things smelled until now.  I want that.  That, and I'm sure socially, some things could change, too.  Women who don't smoke seem to not want to date men who do. 

 


7.22.2004

7 Bow Street Distillery

It's been a long time since I've posted here when drunk. Tonight is one of those nights. I only have a few things to say: for some reason, Danzig buying a house where the water taps emit elfin blood is highly entertaining in cartoon form. Also, for some reason, I can't stop thinking about dollar store thongs and O.G. Hippies.


Save the Robots

Free show, free food, free swimming, and free Detroit! This Sunday, at the Garden Bowl, in beautiful downtown Detroit, they're havin' a patio party. I know, I know, this sounds familiar. That's because they've already had one patio party this year. Well, that one was so big, that they decided to do it again. There will be bands playing on a flatbed truck, free BBQ (including Ginger's special Buffalo wings), and a small swimming pool set up in the back of a pickup truck parked on Woodward. The event starts at 2pm, the first band, The Doctor's Prescription (former members of Bluesong, and a current member of the Detroit City Council) should be playing around 3pm. After that is Serrated Edge, Detroit's first and only Dead Milkmen cover band (RIP Dave Blood) which features members of the Amino Acids and the Jollys, lastly is Detroit's newest punk rocknroll band, the Whiskey Diaries. Check it out this Sunday. Highly recommended.